Forget-Me-Not
by KitsuneCagalli
Summary: He left for the future and she was stranded in the desolate past. It hasn't been easy and she fights a losing battle on all fronts, but a promise from Setsuna in any shape or form was the promise of a lifetime. And she would wait for him even if her clock ticked away. Post-movie Oneshot. Feldt's perspective/internal musings. Warnings: Angst and illness. Sestuna x Feldt.


Well, well, well. I can't believe this has actually been posted xD I mentioned in Amidst Caliginosity that I was writing a post movie story and here it is . . .

Okay, to be frank, I'm not too happy with this piece because it seemed to have lost the spark I was writing this with. I wanted to hit on the emotional attachments and relationships people share in darker circumstances especially in regards to Feldt and Setsuna after the movie plot, but it got a little wordy and I'm not sure if the feelings came across well. But *sigh* I had to get this out because it was festering in my mind and who knows, maybe people will enjoy this anyway.

Warnings: I don't own Gundam 00 and claim any of these characters or the original story plot, but I do utilize them in my creative writing LOL~ Also, to those who like a perfectly grammatical, well edited piece, I'm sorry xD I couldn't edit this anymore so if certain elements seem repetitive or boring, that was just me failing you. xDDDDD I love you guys, sorry, don't hate me? :'D

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**Forget Me Not**

By: _KitsuneCagalli_

"Ms. Feldt, it's time for your daily treatment."

Sometimes she certainly hated this place. It was beautiful yes, with the pastel painted walls and gossamer curtains that let in far more light than kept out. But it was a place for people who were not really people and she most certainly was a person. She thought for herself, did things for herself and led life as she saw fit. At least she did, before getting sick.

"Okay." _I don't really have a choice,_ she thought as Mileina slithered beside her to grab a hold of her pale arms and tuck the pinkette carefully into the wheelchair that was always beside the bed. As carefree as possible, the brunette behind her started chatting about the things her family on Ptolemy II had been up to since her last visit and how much they missed the aqua eyed woman. Staying silent but listening vigilantly, Feldt watched as the younger CIC operator carefully rolled her away from the hallway of identical maple doors all painted in dark, rustic colors into the elevator that would lead to her salvation.

_Ding, ding, ding_ went the metallic box as it whooshed down floors until they reached the ground level. And Feldt listened both to the melodic tone of the younger girl's whimsical voice and to the activity of the birds in the trees as Mileina drove the carbon steel chair holding her steady out the building doors and onto the paved pathway running through the meadow.

The meadow was the only place on the property of Heavens Acre, the Celestial Being secretly operated rehabilitation clinic, where the pink haired woman truly felt at peace. Inside were the crazies and the brain dead, the injured and the incapacitated. Out here, however, amongst the oak, maple and elm trees that dotted the property and the expanse of early spring flowers growing delicately, Feldt could actually _breathe_. Amongst the daisies and lilies, the tulips and foxgloves, the rich marigolds and the collections of hydrangeas, there was actual life breeding and it in turn brought the former CIC operator to life.

"We'll come back and you can work with the flowers after your treatment, Ms. Feldt. Promise," Mileina's reassuring tone came above her, obviously taking note of her distracted features. The younger CIC operator knew how attached the other was to the facility's flowers, since they were the only source of happiness she now found in the world. They were a portal to her past, with the abundance of memories and experiences, and a goal of her future now that she couldn't be what she once was.

Sooner than she'd like, they pushed passed the colorful scenery and back into another rustic building designed to engage the sense of tranquility here at the rehabilitation clinic. This was the treatment facility, the place where all the injured and debilitated former members of Celestial Being were taken care of. There were doctors and engineers who came here to receive the medical and technological assistance they once used to provide for the organization; there were retired pilots and technicians suffering from lost limbs and psychological stresses such as PTSD treated here. And then there were people like Feldt coming in, fit mentally and suffering physically not from battle, but from circumstance. Mileina shuffled quickly through the hallways to the elevator, trying to keep the pinkette's aqua eyes off of some of the more horrific sights of the treatment just as much as her own. The brunette hated the dying too.

_Ding, ding, ding_ went the metallic box as it whooshed up floors until they reached the fifth level, the same room Feldt was every day to get her therapy. The interior was light and airy, colored in yellows and chocolate browns, with the room the former CIC operator was rolled into being a sky blue meant to evoke a sensation of calmness along with the patterned chairs and the wooden tables decorating it. In theory, this worked up until she was hauled onto the only sterile and cold item in the room by her awaiting doctor, onto the therapy chamber, and left to bask in the ultraviolet light that arrested the spreading cellular damage her left side and legs suffers.

As he inserted the needle and then deposited her within the whirling metallic prison that was keeping her alive, Feldt let her thoughts disappear from the here and now so she could remember the reasons for her being in this state in the first place.

_It was just another day for the crew of the Ptolemaios II near the L3 outpost, completely natural. Lasse and Lyle were chatting quietly about an inappropriate magazine that had been picked up their last trip to Earth, while Mileina and Ms. Sumeragi were happily discussing a shopping trip despite the testing they were both doing. Feldt herself sat quietly running her preliminary tests, reading numbers and typing her report while blocking out all other background noise. She hadn't been voluntarily sociable since Setsuna's departure into the unknown with Tieria and Veda. It often showed itself in her dead disposition._

"_-eldt? Feldt, did you hear me?" the motherly sound of one former Leesa Kujo called out. The girl glanced at the captain after coming to from her thoughts and tilted her head in question._

"_I was thinking next time we're near the moon, you should come down with us and see the reconstruction they've done. The place is beautiful." Her elder's words were coaxing and soft, suggested to her but not intrusive._

"_Um, I don't think I-" were the pinkette's immediate words of refusal. But Mileina's tone overrode hers in an instant. _

"_Oh come on Ms. Feldt! You've haven't been off the Ptolemy since Mr. Sei-"_

"_Since before the invasion," Sumeragi evaded quickly. The eldest of the women present knew of the delicate state her CIC operator was in when concerning a certain raven haired pilot. It was evident in her eyes when she came back from the medical bay before the final battle: she had let him go for the greater good of mankind just as he went off into the abyss for the same cause. They were two people who made sacrifices for the wellbeing of others. "The moon's changed Feldt. They have lunar gardens now too; I'm certain you'll enjoy it." _

_Feldt stared at the two females from across her shoulder and smiled delicately at their determination. She couldn't refuse two of the most important people in her life, not when all they were trying to do was cheer up her gloomy personality. As saddened as she was without the pilot of the 00 Qan[T] in her life, Feldt knew that she wouldn't be able to push everyone away forever._

"_Okay," she simply responded. There is silence for a moment before the youngest Celestial Being member whooped in joy and Ms. Sumeragi let out a pleased sigh. Peripherally, the tactical operator noted Lasse and Lyle cheering quietly as well, leading the girl to assume they'd been eavesdropping on the conversation the entire time. Returning to her schematics report with a quick head shake, Feldt got halfway through an update before Ian contacted her through the communications screen._

"_Feldt, I need you and Mileina to come down to the shuttle bay. We need some extra sets of expert hands to run a couple of particle tests," the bespectacled man humored, knowing full well that they had plenty of time and hands to available to complete any number of tests down below. It was nice that Feldt was considered an "expert" though, allowing a bubble of pride to engulf her momentarily. She often wondered if Setsuna would be proud of her progress if he were with them still. Clearing her thoughts and at the assurance that the boys and Ms. Sumeragi had things safely covered at the operations command, the two girls vacated their normal spots and travelled the length of Ptolemy to the shuttle bay where the Gundams were stored. _

"_Ms. Feldt, maybe it's none of my business but . . . I just want you to know that I think he'll come back for you one day," Mileina's amiable voice jarred the companionable silence as they transferred hand rails for a third time in their journey to Ian. Feldt blinked her eyes vigorously as she kept her gaze forward for a few seconds, digesting the other girl's words. When she processed their meaning and who 'he' was, Feldt's heart clenched painfully when she forced a smile and looked behind her to the brunette. _

"_You think so?" she asked, unconvinced._

"_Yup. I feel it in my heart. Just like I know Mr. Erde will come back to me too. Mr. Seiei will come back for you." Her words were so confident and genuine the pinkette nearly let out a choked sob when the Vashti reached out her free hand to grasp her own gloved one, but held back in favor of a noncommittal nod. Mileina, the pure girl with a wonderful heart, was so certain of her love, and yet Feldt was anguished for both their sakes because her wisdom knew better. She wouldn't deny the younger though; that would be too cruel. Especially after the dramatic confession that was made by the girl to Tieria. _

"_I hope you're right Mileina," Feldt quietly replied as she squeezed the brunette's hand, turning back to watch the passing tiled halls in silence until they arrived at their location. When they finally did, Ian was there to greet them properly, greased and dirty from immersive work, but familiar to them all the same. He parted their linked hands when he crowded between them, throwing his strong arms around their shoulders and pressing a fatherly kiss to his daughter's temple. _

"_Thanks for coming down, girls. This will only be a little while and then we can all coerce Sumeragi to take us out to dinner on L3!" Ian bosteriously commented as he began the serious work of pulling wires and mixing circuits when their trio floated up to one of the docked Gundams. Being without armor and dismantled, Feldt couldn't even tell which of their fleet they'd be working on, but she'd take a wild guess and say Harute from the streamlined structure. Shrugging, the pinkette slipped off her jacket and gave it to the passing green Haro and shifted to take her place beside Ian just as he poked a red wire in her direction. Glancing over, Mileina was already holding a green one and a detail wrench ready for her father's request. Smiling affectionately, they went into an intense work session as Feldt pondered on her family. It was nearly an hour later when the cutting and welding and repairing halted when Ian pulled out to catch some sweat and streaked more grease across his cheek._

"_Mileina, can you go to the bridge and manually increase the particle release from the circuit board?" The addressed Vashti, busy with her arms elbow deep beyond the plate covers and mechanic mechanisms gave a huff and a frown to her father. Feldt let out a small giggle and offered her own services to not displace the younger girl since she was mostly free of the circuitry._

"_It's okay Mr. Vashti, I'll go do it." Kicking off from the floor, she felt her stomach bound up as she floated mostly on target through zero gravity. Grabbing hold of the railing and heaving herself onto the deck, the aqua eyed girl jumped right into the activities. Her mechanical instincts took over as she discerned the different panels of wiring and found the one Ian had been requesting. They started a shouting match back and forth about levels and adjustments before more panicked shouts resonated from a few of the engineers and technicians on the bridge with her. Feldt barely had a moment to lift her head and glance over when a wave of heat and prickling pain attacked her side. The sensation was beyond describable and when screaming echoed loudly in the repair bay amongst all the blaring sirens, it took the pink haired woman a moment to realize that some of heart-wrenching yells were coming from her lips. _

"There now Ms. Grace. That's all for today; the results are looking positive," the doctor enthusiastically crooned as Feldt returned from her memories, trying to make her spirits brighter with positive attitudes. She couldn't reciprocate the feeling as her heavy body was being lifted with the help of the youngest Vashti, head spinning and blotchy from the regenerative treatment now that she was upright. These therapies, the pink haired woman was sure, would kill her before she got better if they weren't careful. Slipping heavily back into her wheelchair, the patient let her friend know that she had no strength to visit the flower garden and wanted nothing more than to head back and sleep. There was a subtle disappointment in the brunette's aura, but nothing was said as Feldt hazily remembered being driven back towards her room.

==(O)==

The field of flowers was unfamiliar to her, but she loved it all the same. Begonias, tulips, lilies of the valley, foxgloves, marigolds, hydrangeas, daisies, phlox, geraniums, heliotropes, poppies, forget-me-nots, and desert flowers . . . they were all spread out in a variety of colors and sizes, blowing softly in the wind with the delicate breeze. The air carried the mixing scents to form a floral project of unexplainable sources and the silky textures of all the petals surrounding her left the pink haired woman's mind with an ease she hadn't felt in forever. If she could ever have a garden of her own, she was sure this is an exact replica of her imaginings. It was then that a pressure was registered on her shoulder and the aqua eyed woman turned to glance up into a pair of glistening circuit eyes that haunted her waking thoughts. Her lips fell open into an "o" and any previous thoughts about flowers vanished instantaneously.

"Setsuna?" the name rolled off of her lips like sweetness as her eyes roamed his features which were not as she remembered. His body was clad in his flight suit, but his overall appearance was glistening, almost metallic, making him more monochromatic than when she last saw him. Even his hair carried the sheen she often saw from the machines she worked with, but his features retained their characteristics that she could not describe any other way than as him.

The male behind her nodded solemnly as he scanned her features, and she couldn't help an intake of breath. His otherworldliness, so reminiscent and yet so unfamiliar, was before her as he squatted beside her form and gently took her frail frame within his grip. There was familiarity in the way he held her, though they shared little intimate interactions in the past, and the scent that engulfed her senses; it bore a resemblance to cinnamon and musk, a perfectly Setsuna scent.

"Feldt Grace. It's been a long time since I last saw you." His voice was deep and husky, the perfect imitation of her memories of him as it rumbled through her body. She could only nod, words lost on her as her arms pulled up to encircle his torso and she allowed her nose to nuzzle his neck. Even if he looked as if he were part metal, the former Celestial Being pilot was still as soft as a human body was expected to be.

"It has," she replied with a wistful tone. Her fingers gripped his back with strength, processing how strange it felt to be this close to him. She had to be dreaming because Setsuna was long gone from this world as she knew it, but this illusion would engrave into her heart for safekeeping and dealing with the stresses of her life as she was suffering it now. Her head was pulled away from his form as Setsuna stared down at her with those soulful eyes, raking through the features she was sure he wasn't expecting to see. Feldt knew her eyes had lost their gentle shine and that her once voluminous hair was nothing more than limp strands affected by her treatments and deteriorating physical health. Mileina told her many times about her frail frame and the tautness her face now carried, so she couldn't expect the ever perceptive pilot to overlook such changes.

"Feldt," he interrupted her thoughts, "You look ill." She let out a subtle laugh that carried no humor, and nodded her head.

"I've been sick for a while Setsuna. You've been gone a long time." Regardless of their heavy conversation, the pink haired woman couldn't help but bring up her hand to rest against his cheek and stroke it gently as she smiled. This response didn't suit the pilot's fancy in the least bit as he further frowned and replied to her as his fingers traced her bang covered forehead, her sunken eyes, the bones of her cheek.

"How long? Why aren't you better? Feldt, you should be thriving in the new world." His words carried an air of concern as he continued to watch her, grip tightening on her shoulder where his other hand rested.

"Not everyone is meant to survive into the new world, Setsuna," Feldt returned solemnly, sure that she wouldn't be seeing anything the future brought as the Innovators were going to see. Her fragile mind, decaying mentally in response to her physical ailments, was surely not capable of Innovation if her shortening life was any indication. There was no manner in which she could become like the man before her, and this further saddened her resolve of life. "I've lost the will to live anyway." In that instant, she felt the change of emotion just as much as she observed it in her companion's upset features.

"Feldt Grace, you must survive. You promised Christina and Lockon. And me." His words were tenacious, secure in his knowledge that she made such a promise. Though Feldt did remember these words, her instinct for survival had whittled away with the hard times and her condition.

"I," she hesitated, wondering what his response would be to her next words. "I can't. Not anymore."

"You can." There was no room for argument in his tone. It was one she recalled from his battles, ready to carry out his missions flawlessly and completely.

"No, Setsuna. I can't," she tried to convince, but whether it was more of herself or the 00 pilot was debatable. "Especially without you," she added, not censoring her thoughts as she looked upon his evolved features and despairing her inability to be the same.

"Feldt-"

"No Setsuna. I _can't._ I just can't anymore." The way the words fell out of her mouth, it almost burned her tongue. They were dripping fragility and agony, but at the same time jealousy and confusion. Feldt Grace wanted nothing more than to be herself again━ the stoic girl with an almost unrivalled love for her family and a penchant for mechanics. She wanted to be able to bring about changes to the world with capabilities and internal strength, not sit rotting away in her prison cell of a room at the Heavens Acre. The reality of that impossibility hit the former CIC operator heavily though.

"It's hard enough being alone and sick here while the world moves on without me, but without the support and dreams like you used to give me, I simply can't handle it anymore." There was a finality about her tone that caused her to push him from her grasp and to land back on her hands. She dragged her heavy lower limbs, dysfunctional and near dead, as best she could from him without wincing as her eyes stung and she shook her head at him. It was so hard to explain her feelings, especially when she understood that she'd never walk again because of the damage her nerves sustained from the accident or that she'd never be able to see the worlds the way she assumed he had.

Tearing her gaze away from his, the pink haired woman bit her lip to regulate the quiver her voice was sure to express before speaking quietly to him. "I can't Setsuna. Please, just leave me be."

"I won't," his words immediately called out to her. She knew him well enough to know he was glaring at her in anger and possibly disgust. But when he spoke, his tone was determined as the grip around her arms returned and he forced her face to be in direct line with his. "You need to live. And I'll help you." Nodding in affirmation to himself, he continued to gaze at her unwaveringly.

"Feldt. Wait for me." She stared up into his sincere eyes and could only asked what he meant. Before he replied to her, the Innovator looked to his side and plucked a purplish stem bundle and presented it to her. "Wait for me. I'll come for you. Just wait." With that statement he released her slowly, pulling away and she clutched the flowers to her chest earnestly, noting their identities as forget-me-nots. He walked backwards so as not to lose contact with her eyes and they remained locked together for what felt like ages before he disappeared in the distance and she slowly saw the field of flowers and the world itself fade from her vision.

She bolted upright as best as she could with the shout of his name on her lips. Her pastel painted walls and gossamer curtains remained as they had since her arrival at Heavens Acre, but the air carried an unusual draft, something that spoke of coming rain through the open window and the faint trace of cinnamon. Glancing around desperately, the aqua eyed former Celestial Being operator tried to conclude what had happened. Had it all been merely a dream? A fantasy created by her lonely and desolate mind? Did she really have a conversation with Setsuna or was it all . . . an illusion? As the cotton comforter was scrunched between her shaking hands and the pain in her legs remained as they had when she fell asleep, Feldt knew she had to face reality and admit the the raven haired pilot was nothing more than a figment of her imagination and slid back onto her bed with tears pricking her eyes.

==(O)==

"She's been like this for a few weeks. Just . . . watching." Even though he was trying to be hushed, Feldt could hear her doctor's nervous voice through the ajar door. She was watching the scenery around the private facility, but that didn't mean she was stupid enough to block out the world completely. Her nature from Celestial Being, being aware at all times and in all situations, was a habit that refused to leave her. A familiar motherly tone thanked the doctor before the door was opened and shut, but the aqua eyed woman kept her gaze firmly on the gardener watering the lilies near the walkway. Maybe today she'd go and help tend to the flowers, since they had been neglected in her absence.

"How are you feeling?" Sumeragi lightly asked her, accompanied by hands resting on her slim shoulders. The addressed woman gave a half hearted reply in the affirmative and noted another patient, one missing his left leg, being wheeled around the gardens by an older woman in a business suit. Thus she wasn't expecting it when her chair was twisted around and the busty tactical forecaster perched before her with tear filled eyes and grasping the pinkette's hands tightly. "Feldt. How are _you_?" she asked again, far more serious.

How did she feel? Pained or happy? Tired or excited? In all honesty, the woman didn't know herself. Since that unusual dream she'd had about her Meister, the tactical operator couldn't pretend to be unaffected even to her loved ones. The strange words about waiting for Setsuna and being strong, no matter how much a figment of her imagination, sparked a hope for life that she hadn't experienced since her arrival here. Though logic warned her that dreams were a subconscious effort of mental organization her brain performed in response to daily life stress, of which she had plenty, a certain feeling resonated with her that would not let her shake off the dream. There was something too vivid and memorable about that night between the ghostly sensations and the illusory scents of the air that plagued Feldt unyieldingly. Something that resonated with the sweet memory of Mileina's long forecasted reminder that one day she was sure Tieria and Setsuna would both return to them, for them. And so she let herself foolishly listen to her dream Innovator and waited. Waited for him to show up and help her.

"I'm . . . waiting."

"Waiting? For what?" was the saddened question, almost afraid to hear the response. Her mother figure was now rubbing comforting circles onto the back of her hands, to relax them both from the conversation's turn she assumed.

"For the end." The pinkette knew how it sounded, but it was the most realistic truth Feldt could imply. She knew that even if Setsuna came for her, as much as her days were now devoted to believing in this knowledge, the only assistance she could garner from him would come in the form of her death. There was nothing to be done if the specialized treatments of Celestial Being's best couldn't cure her so how could she falsely believe in a miracle from her Innovator? Then again, the woman reasoned with herself, trusting that from the far reaches of space Setsuna had somehow encountered her mind and promised to return was a miraculous, if not idiotic, conviction too.

"Don't you say that Feldt Grace!" The panicked voice brought her spiraling back into her room from the whirlwind of thoughts with a start. Sumeragi Lee Noregia appeared ready to viciously shake her fragile frame with the outburst. "There will be no such thing for you, understood? That is an order!" There were actual tears now caressing the elder's cheeks and Feldt didn't know what to do besides gathering her into her lap and whispering apologies while stroking her auburn locks. The former tactical operator would need to curb her words more carefully in the future if she created such sorrow and strife. After all, she was still a member of Celestial Being who fought against such things.

"I'll try Ms. Sumeragi. I'll try."

==(O)==

"Is it okay if I leave them here for you?" Today her visitors were Mileina and Lasse, the former arranging the tulips they had picked aesthetically while the latter was helping her frail and gray body into her bed with minimal effort. He'd often teased her that she'd barely weighed enough to match his dumbbells, but as of late Feldt had to wonder if it was merely a joke. He patted her legs after covering them with her blanket and sat beside her to critique the youngest's work.

"The forget-me-nots should be in the middle, since we only have one bundle," she commented with a tilt of her head, observing the design.

"And you need to trim the stems on those lilies over there. Those two stick out too far," Lasse added, smiling at Feldt's nod of approval. "Florist Feldt agrees." Mileina huffed in annoyance at the comradery and let her thoughts be known.

"Mr. Aeon, why don't you come help and do it yourself?" After her words, she blew a raspberry in their direction but all the same took the two plants to the sink and snipped their ends. The pink haired woman genuinely let her lips curve up at the antics her friends were trying to create in order to cheer her up. Today's session had left her nauseous and with a slight cut on her temple from accidentally catching the corner of the sink on her way to the toilet upon return to her room. Besides that, she'd also been suffering bouts of numbness throughout her left side for the last two weeks, which had mostly condemned her to her quarters on orders of bedrest. It was a pleasant change to be surrounded by people, more so her family, who saw her not as the girl with gamma ray nerve damage, but Feldt Grace, the flower-loving, robot-building Celestial Being member whose social awkwardness was the butt of many a joke.

"It's good to see you smile Feldt." Lasse glanced to her out of the corner of his scarred eye, smiling in his handsome, manly fashion as the hand resting on her covered ankle squeezed gently. It was endearing watching him be affectionate with her fragile self when she knew that secretly they all wanted nothing more than to cry and tell her how sorry they felt for her situation.

"Thank you for the company Lasse," she stated out loud, reaching out to tap his arm sisterly as best she could with her minimal strength. The aqua eyed woman also took a moment to glance back to the youngest girl in the room, who had just finished the arrangement and turned back to them in satisfaction. "And of course you too Mileina." The brunette nodded in reply, a sad smile finally breaking through her facade.

"We have to go now Ms. Feldt. Ms. Sumeragi only gave us a few hours of ship leave." Feldt nodded in understanding, graciously trying to return the gesture by straightening her slumped position and giving an 'understood' command in her normal operator voice. Both requested that she not bother with formalities and focused instead on resting well before parting ways with her in extended distress of hugs, kisses, and promises of future visits.

When the door shut and she was alone, Feldt slid down into her comforter and stared at the arrangement left for her. Today was one of the more worse days in her therapy, but the surprise visit of the Ptolemaios crew left her radiant. Everyone had dropped by to see her, including Ian who had taken an opportunity to sit by her bedside and apologize yet again for her being here. Numerous times the former CIC operator tried to explain to the elder Vashti that the accident wasn't his fault, but the glasses-wearing engineer would most likely never stop blaming himself for her accident. And she was sure that Ian would have continued his never ending pleas for forgiveness if given the chance, but Ms. Sumeragi had only left Mileina and Lasse behind after an hour of reunions. Apparently, Celestial Being was always working and this visit had a second motive. Not that that held any less merit to their actions; the pinkette was happy they even remembered her to begin with. Mentally shaking her depressive thoughts, Feldt watched the sunset orange and red beams radiate from her window, blowing a breeze into her gossamer room with the smells from the garden below.

The fall was creeping sluggishly in with the weather changes so the only scents that penetrated were the hardy plants of late summer; but there was that odd smell of cinnamon the aqua eyed woman sometimes caught, a vague reminder that Feldt had to live on. There was a promise of return from her Gundam Meister, and that was what had been driving the woman for the last couple of months. Although she didn't want to outright confirm it, Feldt was getting a little worried and it was something reflected in her doctor's opinion; when she saw a mop of dark hair and tan skin arriving at Heavens Acre, whether patient or visitor, the mini heart monitor she had attached to her wrist would go erratic and trouble the staff with false alarms. It was because of this that Feldt ultimately asked for the device to be removed with Ms. Sumeragi's backing after the pinkette explained why the incidents were occurring. The tactical forecaster did not question why Feldt seemed to expect the Innovator pilot to show up; she merely conceded to her wishes because of the willingness to live it brought about.

But the waiting had been going on for a while now. It had been months since her encounter with the former Exia pilot, and the woman wasn't sure how long the mere promise of waiting for him was going to pull her through. Still, Feldt thought as the darkening rays lulled her into a dream state, she'd wait just a little longer for him to return to her as promised. After all, a forget-me-not was the sort promise worth waiting for, especially if it comes from Setsuna F. Seiei.

==(O)==

The hands squeezing her own were slight and soft, but there was a reassurance to it all the same. A name surfaced to her muddled thoughts, though she knew it was incorrect. She didn't need her eyesight to know it wasn't the person she was seeking out; nevertheless, it hoarsely tumbled out from her lips.

"Setsuna?" There was a sad sigh followed by a tightening around her dry fingers before words replied to her in the negative.

"No Feldt, not Setsuna I'm afraid. But hopefully we won't disappoint you?" the gracious tone of Marie Parfacy said. The sick woman finally opened her eyes and took in the forms very familiar to her. Marie, her glossy silver hair braided and bunned, was holding onto her hand sisterly while sitting at her bedside. On her other side, a chair was pulled up and occupied by Allelujah, whose tangled fringe was once again well past his shoulders and in a ponytail. Both wore the Celestial Being uniform she too once donned underneath their light coats. Apparently she'd woken up not long after their initial arrival.

"Marie. Allelujah," Feldt replied, a small grin taking over her features. The pair had returned to Ptolemaios a few years after her accident, according to the correspondence from Mileina. It seemed that their endless wandering had finally given way to a reason for living and they found their way home to them. Feldt was so happy to have them back in her life, especially considering they had made it an express effort to visit her more often than most of the others (though Mileina beat them out by far).

"I hope we didn't wake you. The doctor said that you've been needing more rest than usual, but we couldn't resist seeing you today," Allelujah provided helpfully, also leaning forward to take the pinkette's free hand. There was a genuine exuberance to his mismatched gaze that immediately alerted the youngest of the three present that something was up. She took a moment to look at her female friend and noted the same expression behind her normally placid features.

"No, it's fine. I'm glad you're here. But what's the big occasion?" There was no use pretending she didn't notice their jitteriness.

"You could tell huh?" The Harute Meister questioned, only to have Marie burst out in joy over his mellow tone.

"Feldt, Allelujah asked me to marry him!" The sheer excitement the super soldier exploded with overwhelmed the aqua eyed woman for a moment before the words registered in her mind. And then a smile, one the sort she hadn't used in a very long time, overtook her face and she was shouting in excitement alongside Marie. Allelujah too joined in the festive nature the atmosphere took, both taking her fragile hands and bouncing them up and down as she shot question after question at them. The silver haired woman answered most of the hows, whens, and whats, while the Gundam pilot took the initiative to explain the why; the information session lasted no more than five minutes of express shouting, but to Feldt the unfamiliar frenzy lasted an eternity. She was so absolutely joyous that she didn't even realize her chest was hurting until her breath became short and somewhat raspy.

"Feldt? Feldt!" Two voices collectively shouted as she keeled over and snatched her hands away from their grips in order to claw at her heart. She couldn't breath and it was hurting her so badly. Her eyes were watering as Allelujah ran to get a nurse or a doctor, she couldn't even confirm. The only registering sound was the former A-Laws pilot holding her shoulders and trying to pull her form out from the hunch while shouting her name. Then the voices around her multiplied, but the last glimpse of a face she saw was of her friends being corralled out of the room with terrified expressions.

And then her eyes were open again and the ceiling lights were aglow with the sunset tones of the early evening. It took her a moment to recall why she was blankly staring up above before her memory conjured up the inexplicable pain she'd felt just after hearing Marie and Allelujah's wonderful news.

"Marie? Allelujah?" She called out huskily, trying to get the croak out of her voice. She attempted to rise but the heaviness of her limbs prevented her from doing so. There was also a new item in her line of sight, a fancy IV machine whose plastic tube was pulled right into her left arm. She then saw a head loom over her and hunter colored locks framing the face.

"Feldt? How are you feeling?" he questioned at once, quickly letting his mismatched eyes roam her features for the slightest sign of discomfort. He had removed his coat and uniform jacket and seemed to have been stationed at her side for quite some time.

"I'm okay. A little thirsty. What happened?" As soon as the word 'thirsty' came out Allelujah busily made to grab water for her from the pitcher and glass on the bedside table, even finding a straw to put in it for easier consumption. Only until he was sure that she was satisfied did he decided to speak with her.

"The nurses said that the excitement put a strain on your heart. We shouldn't have gotten you roused like that, not with the progression of your illness." A sorrow she only associated with his self loathing took purchase upon his countenance, and Feldt hated herself more than she was sure he hated himself for wrecking the special moment they wanted to share with her. How could she do this to them?

"I'm sorry I ruined the announcement," she mumbled remorsefully.

"No, you didn't ruin anything. It was our fault. We just thought it might, you know, help with all of this." He gestured to the space around them, knowing full well that she despised Heavens Acre. Both super soldiers seemed to understand this sense of imprisonment she was tolerating. Returning his gesturing limbs to the bed, his calloused hands landed on the back of her bony ones and patted them reassuringly.

"It did. I just wish I could properly congratulate you and celebrate." Her eyes stung as she watched his gentle face, again being taken over by the internal loathing at crushing their momentary happiness.

"You will Feldt. Ms. Sumeragi says that she'll get all the special care required for you to be at the wedding. We were planning it not far from here anyway." The smile he presented her with, in addition to the kind words, sent the girl tearing. They were too kind, her family. She didn't deserve to share their happiness. "Marie," the heterochromatic man continued, motioning his head behind him where a sleeping lump could be made out on the love seat, "even wants to bring by the wedding dresses to show you. She thinks your style will be a little more tasteful than Mileina's."

Feldt tearfully giggled at the male's humor and nodded instead of speaking, knowing well that all that would come out would be a choked sob. There was also no need to get her heart overactive again, so that was all she did. She'd just appreciate the fact that a miraculous event was headed their way and Celestial Being was to be gifted with a small semblance of normalcy. It seemed that she had another reason for carrying on now.

"I could make Marie's bouquet, with all the flowers from the garden in the spring," she contemplated, enlightened by the mood. "Roses, peonies, holly," her thoughts scoured for good flower meanings and in a second another flower came into her mind and out her mouth, "forget-me-nots." It seemed that the Meister was content with that last flower and gave a hum of approval.

"That'd be perfect for her." Another pat to her hands and a goofy smile gazed at her in encouragement. "It'll be great Feldt. Our big happy family." The tall European man sighed in content at the thought and the pinkette again nodded in agreement, with a quiet 'It will' attached to his sentiments. There was an amiable silence as the sat together, listening to the silver haired woman's steady breaths and the cool late fall wind breezing into the room. Soon, winter would be here, taking away the precious reprieve Feldt had, though she doubted with her latest symptoms that they'd even consider her adventuring outside. At least she could now count on visits from the pair and possibly the others more consistently. And all too soon, the male beckoned her to rest with the promise that both Marie and he would be there to greet her in the morning.

==(O)==

She'd been coughing for weeks now. It seemed that the only times she wasn't coughing was when she slept, and even then, the doctors had told her that she did. The words they wouldn't speak to her, however, were the ones she already knew. She was dying. Instead of waiting for the long hours of the day to pass in hacking fits though, the pink haired woman turned to sleep as a reprieve for her symptoms.

So here she was in her floral wonderland once again, a sight she hadn't seen in many a month. The air still carried that unidentifiable mix of flowers and cinnamon and musk, all wrapped up in an olfactory collision. But there was no one there in her reprieve so somehow, someway, she had conjured up plain paper and a pencil in her dream and resorted to drawing out what she could not see. Her unconscious self was a far better artist that she was in real life, capturing the clusters of purple buds and blooms in an artistically recognizable manner, being held out to her by a hand that belonged to a faceless person. Feldt knew it was Setsuna who was holding it out to her as a gift, but there was no manner in which the former CIC operator could etch his features. So instead her efforts settled on the flowers below her shifting hand, shading and sketching until the graphite copy was black and gray replica of the forget-me-nots.

"It's beautiful." She didn't sense his presence but it was the one person she had been waiting for all these months returned to her. He was unmistakable even in her dreams with that caustic but determined voice and that aura of understanding and in response to his comment the swell in her chest was only rivaled by the smile she dared not hide, as she accepted the compliment graciously.

"Setsuna. Thank you." He settled himself beside her, his gloved hand finding its way atop of hers and relaxing in the space they shared. The pinkette often wondered if her intimacy with her love was a genuine connection they shared or an uncontainable side effect of her dream. Not that it mattered to the aqua eyed woman; she was content with it either way because it was far better than anything reality could offer her outside of this paradise in her head. Settling the paper and pencil aside with a finished flair, the female allowed her mind free reign as her eyes scanned the fields of flowers that made up the landscape. It was here she heard a minute intake of breath that suggested her visitor was going to make a statement.

"I'm coming Feldt Grace. Just a little longer." He beckoned her to look into his glistening sight, as if to reaffirm with his gaze what the words were expressing. She needed not that confirmation though, knowing that when his voice's intensity changed in that manner, his feelings were being conveyed.

"I can wait," she replied steadily, quite sure of herself. After all, hadn't she been faithfully doing so up until this point anyway? "I'll always wait for you." Feldt didn't mean for the sentence to come out so morbidly depressive, but it was a difficult emotion to keep out of her repertoire lately. That sense of bleakness wasn't lost upon her Meister as he turned her towards him more and brought his face closer to hers. There was barely any room left between them, something that had the woman with the rosy locks blushing at, when his following words came.

"Don't be sad. Just a little more." She watched him watching her, trying to push her gloominess away because for once she wasn't actually sad at all. Her focus was so entranced that when she felt his warm lips upon her own it took her awhile to realize that a kiss was even in progress. Not letting the chance go however, Feldt's eyes slid closed and she pressed back with deliberate touches, allowing thoughts to touch her mind and satisfy the small yearning for the Innovator Meister she'd been longing for. Dreaming or not, this would help her to strive on.

"Okay." His hand was pleasuring her neck, tugging her closer and filling her with a sense of freshness she rarely saw these days. The Kurdish man was always exceptional when it came to determination of anything he cherished and even when he pulled away from their liplock to concentrate upon her wilted features, his emotional affection remained with her.

"I'll be there soon." When his image faded along with his lingering promise from her this time and she woke up coughing heavily, Feldt didn't feel nearly as burdened mentally as her body did physically; Setsuna had reached out and promised her to be coming soon and that was enough to control the sick puddle in her stomach.

==(O)==

Usually Feldt could sleep relatively peacefully throughout the night so long as she didn't toss or turn to much and end up pulling out her IV. But tonight, something subconscious roused the pinkette to a less than desirable state. There was an odd sensation tickling her toes, the sort that wasn't pleasant and proceeded further up into her chest, and her there was acute bubbles of pain radiating from her extremities. It was alarming and crushing, leading Feldt to hunch over in a gasping state and reach out for anything to perch a hold of. There was nothing besides the bed sheets and bedside table, which the pinkette attempted to grasp, but due to the panicked state coming from her distressing predicament it was really more of a banging and knocking-things-around mess. The IV was definitely no longer running cool liquid through her veins either if the pendulum swing of the plastic tube was any indication. Her head finally succumbed to the anguish it was going through physically, falling forehead first onto the edge of the bed and the former CIC operator curled up her useless and heavy legs in attempt at some comfort as her breaths became ragged and her form trembled.

There was almost nothing she could do as her lower torso lost what little feeling remained and her head started pounding intensely in time with the shakes wracking her body. This was the end, the last moments of her life, no question in her mind. And the pink haired woman couldn't help the tears that rolled down her cheeks, a sensation she could surprisingly still feel amongst her rasping breaths and her hand gripping her throbbing chest in sadness and pain. She was going to die here in this room at the Heavens Acre, alone and hurting and without any rescue or comfort. There was no Mileina or Lasse to go call for help from the medical staff; no Ms. Sumeragi or the Vashtis to hold her close and promise better times. There was no Lyle or Marie or Allelujah or Tieria. No Lichty or Anew or Neil or Christina. And worst of all, after all her expectations and wishing and suffering, there was no Setsuna. There wasn't an Innovator Meister here to vanish her agony nor was he here to console her in the final moments of her life as she would have liked. She had strived so hard for no purpose, for no result. There was just a flash of fear and panic as she realized the horror of dying alone and frightened.

She was afraid.

With the approaching end though, as her mind slowly lost sense and logic, the woman with the soulful aqua eyes squeezed shut pondered how much better this turn of circumstance was than if she'd been with any of the others from the Ptolemaios. Her family didn't have to see her at the lowest point of her illness, nor did they have to comfort her when she knew there was nothing to be done anymore. But best perhaps of all was that there was no one here to seek help, which meant there would be no one rushing in to save her and keep her in this miserable state of life she was leading, evidenced by the tightened form she was contorted in as the end was approaching. Her only continuing regret as the throbbing was nothing more than a blip on the edge of her quieting mind was that Feldt truly wished she could have met Setsuna at least one last time so she could have told him her feelings. That she loved him and only him since a very long time ago.

Her eyes were closed now, the clamped chest and strengthless limbs all fading in her mind when all at once they disappeared. The pain was no longer coiling within her, but instead there was a warmth spreading through her from the inside. It radiated first from her head and then into her chest and from there, almost as if her heart was not pumping blood but warm energy, to the rest of her system. It took only a moment, but she let herself linger on the feeling, a strange sort of expression that she couldn't fathom. The sensation engulfed her completely and the pink haired woman relaxed her features in favor of the delicate feelings that consumed her.

A hum accompanied the warmth, though it was a long while before she actually registered the sound because her entire being was focused upon the warmth. But with the realization of the musical tone, there also came an awareness that something was stroking her head, which she didn't even realize was not debilitating her but functioning normally. And soon, it was as if she were coming to from a dreamy state, awakening into the world she had assumed already was reality. A few minutes more the pinkette basked in this new knowledge and feeling before her eyes slid open to the sight of her wrinkled comforter. She was still on her bed? But how could that be possible when she was clearly dying . . .?

"Feldt." The addressed woman's eyes widened in disbelief as she listened to the husky tone, one she could never mistake. It was the voice that had been haunting her, it was _his_ voice that she'd been craving . . .

"S-Setsuna?" The woman couldn't alter the position she was in, curled up still in a ball and staring down at the finely knit fabric of her blanket. The only thing that she noted was the way her voice, once a raspy and cracking tone was now smooth and controlled just as it had been in her youth.

"I'm here now." There was relief and understanding lacing his words which caused the pinkette to find strength in her new self and rise from the bed to seek out the person speaking to her. He wasn't far, sitting right beside her and hand resting on her head, following her motions as she sat. The faintest trace of a smile was gracing his features and her eyes bulged in shock. Setsuna was really here. "I'm glad you waited for me." A reassuring stroke of her hair and the woman choked on a small sob.

"You p-promised me. So I w-waited." It was difficult to keep her voice in check, what with all the emotional baggage coming through. His form was just as it had been in her dream: glistening, almost metallic in nature even to the point his hair had taken on a silver sheen. His flightsuit was still the same model from which he departed the Ptolemaios II in, though his helmet was missing and his suit was unzipped just as it always would be after a mission. It was as if he hadn't aged a day in all these years, and somehow, Feldt knew that she had returned to that time as well.

"You trusted me Feldt." His honeyed voice confident and glad, almost as if he weren't sure that she would. And to be fair and honest, the aqua eyed woman certainly had her days when she had wanted to give in, to let her faith in him disappear for the colder truth of reality. But it was exactly her faith, however foolish and irrational, in this Meister that prevented such resolution and drove her on to her deserved conclusion.

"You made me better," she observed after a moment of watching him, glancing down to her hands which no longer looked like a skeleton and held her familiar pale color. The hand on the side of her head stroked her again in the affirmative at the same time his free hand lifted to present her with a familiar flower. She took a second to find his eyes again in question, but there was nothing in them beyond trust and subtle happiness. She couldn't even comprehend how she could read all these motivations and feelings he was outwardly demonstrating, but she wasn't complaining in the least.

"You need to live." His words were addressed to both of them, even though directly it was an explanation for her comment. She took his proffered gift and smiled down at the purple colored petals, noting the decorated veins that were spread underneath their surfaces. Her flowers were so rich and alive, details she could make out even in the lightless room they sat in, and reminded her of Setsuna's spirit. Especially when he finally pulled away from their comfortable closeness to stand and walk over to the open window of her room and stare out into the midnight sky. Yet it hit her again, for the second time this evening, how her life was going to end up once he left. She needed to live in the Meister's eyes, but she couldn't survive anymore without his presence whether she was healthy or not.

"I. I can't." The tears which hadn't really stopped falling increased again with the overwhelming sense of loss at the thought of his departure from her, and the smiled she tried to force for the Innovator was crushing her heart. "Not without you. I told you that before." He turned to face her with confusion, before seeing the streaming tears and recalling her dreams.

"Who said it was without me?" He reached his metallic tinged hand to her, waiting for her response with an unwavering gaze. Was this an invitation? Did he really come here to save her and take her away from Heavens Acre and everything that her life had amounted to? Excitement started to build in her chest, only to be deflated as images passed through her head. Flashes of Mileina and Ms. Sumeragi. Allelujah and Marie. Lasse and Lyle. Ian and Linda. Haro. Everyone who she'd be leaving behind. Because Feldt knew that going with Setsuna was leaving them forever. After all, the pinkette had seen what had happened the first time her Innovator had departed from them into the unknown. She still wasn't even sure that his presence here wasn't a post-mortem hallucination phenomenon her brain was slowly filtering through before she actually passed on.

Despite all these silly thoughts, and the serious ones, a tiny emotional bubble was rising in her chest. It was a pang that told her this was her salvation, her happiness. It didn't matter how he'd got here or what she'd suffered through. Setsuna came back for her, saved her, and now was waiting patiently for her to join him. She was free to choose a path of contentment with the one person she'd longed to meet and . . .

"Setsuna, I have to tell you something." There was a curious glance pointed in her direction from the tall Meister, watching her carefully so as to not miss any information. His metallic hair fell across his eyes, but it didn't seem to phase him in the slightest.

"I've been waiting for you, never forgetting because you promised me. But in all this time, I've also been thinking about myself."The flower stem harboring her small purple blooms was twirled between her fingers unconsciously, Feldt not very sure how her next words would be phrased. But she had decided when she had been dying, when she had experienced one glaring regret before her time, that if the opportunity arose she would tell him what she needed to. This was her chance. "I needed to tell you, because I could never confess to you back then," with a solid inhale of breath, "I love you."

"Feldt Grace." It was so rare, even in the memories she'd had of him during their time together as Celestial Being members, that Setsuna F. Seiei smiled. But here the raven haired man was, lips curved upward and gentle eyes focused solely on her figure. A connection ran through her mind as she waited for a response, the unknown warmth returning full force and engulfing her in a swell of adoration that was alien from her own. It's presence was distinctly familiar, just like the man before her, but it was almost a third person in the room that had a personality all its own. Feldt wondered if this was the ELS which certainly seemed an inextricable part of Setsuna now, connecting them together and allowing for an understanding beyond words.

Setsuna was still beaming at her in that stoically affectionate manner when instead of having his single hand outstretched to her, his other hand came up and he pulled open his limbs wide as if awaiting her form within his grasp. And in that moment, despite her doubts and aversions, the pink haired woman did not wait any longer and ran, with her youthful and healthy and no longer paralyzed limbs, into his awaiting arms. And when he hugged her close to his form, buzzing and warm and _alive_, Feldt understood what she had been waiting for. Why she didn't give up or forget.

Her place was with Setsuna, and she was finally there.

==(O)==

"She'll be really surprised I bet," Mileina cooed as the final dings from the elevator suggested their arrival. Between herself and Marie were many dress bags filled with potential wedding dresses that they'd be asking for opinions on, and she was certain that it'd at least ease some of the pain her older sister figure was suffering these last two months.

"I hope so! She'll also probably be mad at us for not visiting sooner, but we'll make it up to her," the silver haired woman winked back in mischief. They slowly stepped their way to the familiar wooden door that led to their friend's quarters. Between the two of them, the women managed to open the door into the room quietly. Both had decided that if their companion was sleeping, they'd wait and let her rest. While Marie was fiddling with closing the door despite her overflowing hands, Mileina entered the space to catch a glimpse of their friend.

"Ms. Feldt?" the younger female whispered, "Guess who's- Ms. Feldt?" There was no one present in the pastel painted room. The only bed visible was rumpled as if someone had slept there, and the large windows were pulled wide open, allowing cool April air to course into the area. Feldt's wheelchair was just below the window, deserted and forgotten. Mileina quickly stepped back to catch the super soldier's arm, anxiously pointing to the room and having a sick feeling bud through her chest.

"Ms. Marie, Ms. Feldt is, is . . ." Taking note of the brunette's watering eyes, Marie scanned the area to discover the same sights as Mileina did. Shouting out a curse, the soon-to-be bride dropped her bags and flew out of the room, screaming for nurses. The blue eyed Vashti too dropped her bags and slowly made her way forward, getting sicker with each step. Her friend couldn't have . . . could she? The CIC operator wasn't sure if she could force herself to glance out the window in realization of what she might see, so she instead her tearing eyes scanned the floor beside the wheelchair, to look for any evidence. What surprised her was a small, wilting bundle of forget-me-nots laying innocently beside the metal chair, which she immediately took into her grasp. The brunette recalled the favorite flower of Feldt's, especially after Ms. Sumeragi explained the gift the pinkette's dream self had received from Setsuna. To be laying here forgotten like this . . .

Mileina could hear the numerous voices headed this way, but her mind was not focused on that. Instead she glanced out into the clear sky above, the air blooming with the scents of spring flowers including the purple cusps, and she let a sad smile cross her features.

"So he finally came for you, huh Ms. Feldt?"

:::::::::::{ Fin }:::::::::::

* * *

. . . Yeah . . . Sorry . . . Idek . . .

I'm really curious and actually would love to read some reviews about your opinions and what you SestunaxFeldt fans felt from this fic. I think it's a little different from what other fic writers have chosen as topics so any feedback, good or bad, short or long, fangirling or interpretation would be appreciated~

Thanks my lovely readers~


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